I read The Chocolate Lovers’ Diet first and really enjoyed it. Then I read the first in the series, The Chocolate Lovers’ Club and I really enjoyed that too. Both are really great comedies, with some really amusing characters and situations, as well as some more serious storylines that nevertheless fit into the book well. There’s just one problem. The two books are pretty much the same.
Yes, the characters and storylines have moved on a little bit between one book and the next and there are differences, but they mostly have exactly the same problem. It’s true that the same problems can hang around for years and it’s not unusual to think you’ve solved one problem, only for it to come back again. In that sense, it’s a realistic book. But you don’t want two stories about the same set of characters to be that much alike.
There are parts of the book that aren’t funny at all. Lucy’s complete and total inability to cope with any kind of job is terrifying. Even I’d have done better than her. I’d have done better with driving that van and I don’t even have a driving licence for a car. And if I’d trashed that bookshop – which I never would have done, at least not to that extent – I wouldn’t run away and leave the whole mess behind for my elderly boss to find when he got back from his hospital appointment. I’d want to, I really would. But you can’t do things like that.
But Lucy is mostly an adorable character. Once the incidents mentioned above are over with and she’s back to her old job and back to sitting at her desk, doing no work at all (she’s much less trouble when she’s doing nothing), you can put your reservations about her out of your mind, and start loving her again.
Then there’s the sex-mad Chantal. Yes, she is incredibly stupid and I wouldn’t blame anyone for calling her a slag. She does have a bit of an obsession. But she too is a very nice person. Nadia is amazing the way she deals with her young son and her husband’s gambling addiction and their money worries, not to mention the fact she still has some strength to spare for providing support for her friends.
Autumn is perhaps a bit too nice but I also think she’s shockingly unprofessional. She runs a craft class to support young people who have been in trouble with the law. It’s very commendable but when Autumn decides to turn to a bit of criminality herself, I can’t help questioning her integrity. Yes, it was in order to help Chantal who had got herself into trouble and was herself the victim of a crime. But that doesn’t make it okay that Autumn should either a) break the law herself or b) let the former criminals she’s supposed to be helping think there are times when it’s okay to do things like that.
The law-breaking section is brilliant though. Very funny and I did kind of wish I was there with them. But it doesn’t make it right.
Thursday 29 October 2009
Sunday 25 October 2009
The Outlaw Varjak Paw (S F Said)***
I hadn’t read the sequel before, but I thought I had a pretty good idea of what it was about from the opera. I didn’t. The opera only really shows the very end and the book has different characters in.
The problem with sequels is that they can be disappointing. Even the most brilliant characters can have their limits, and only so many stories can be told about them. Also, Varjak has learned all the Seven Skills of the Way in the last book, Varjak Paw. So where could the character go from here?
But S. F. Said seems to have thought about this. Sally Bones makes only a fleeting – although very memorable – appearance in Varjak Paw but she’s someone who stays in your mind. She’s not the sort of character you’d create, only to limit her to one appearance. And in The Outlaw Varjak Paw, the character is given the story she deserves. She’s one of the most chilling villains I’ve ever read about and remains so even now I’ve read the book, and I know all her secrets. (Or I think I do.)
Varjak defeated The Gentlemen at the end of Varjak Paw, and has now returned to life on the streets. However, he’s not out of danger as cats are still disappearing – or worse. In a way, it surprises me this is a children’s book, as a lot of it is terrifying. But I don’t think I was scared of anything much as a child. Now, I’ve realised the world is dangerous and there are people out there who want to hurt you. In some ways, I haven’t grown up at all, and some people would say I’m quite babyish in the things I’ve scared of. But I do think adults have a more developed sense of fear.
Jalal no longer needs to teach Varjak The Way – although his powers have conveniently and rather inexplicably deserted him. I never quite understand why Varjak lost his powers or how he got them back, but it did give the situation an extra sense of urgency. Jalal teaches Varjak other things instead – and, as in the earlier book, Jalal’s teachings help Varjak as he progresses through the story.
Said is great at creating strong characters and there are lots of new ones to enjoy here. The Scratch Sisters (for some reason I keep calling them The Snatch Sisters), a trio of kung-fu Siamese cats, are my favourites. Then there are a couple of Sally Bones’ minions who change side, Omar and Ossie, who seem rather more cuddly. I loved the way such different individuals – mostly cats, but with Cludge the dog, of course - were bonding together in order to fight Sally Bones.
But the veiled sex references didn’t seem quite appropriate. Maybe it’s because I’ve seen the opera, where Holly is presented as being around sixteen, with Varjak no more than ten. So when Said starts hinting that there might be Holljak kittens before too long, it’s a little bit disturbing. Maybe if I hadn’t seen the opera, I’d think it was sweet, but I have, so I don’t.
The problem with sequels is that they can be disappointing. Even the most brilliant characters can have their limits, and only so many stories can be told about them. Also, Varjak has learned all the Seven Skills of the Way in the last book, Varjak Paw. So where could the character go from here?
But S. F. Said seems to have thought about this. Sally Bones makes only a fleeting – although very memorable – appearance in Varjak Paw but she’s someone who stays in your mind. She’s not the sort of character you’d create, only to limit her to one appearance. And in The Outlaw Varjak Paw, the character is given the story she deserves. She’s one of the most chilling villains I’ve ever read about and remains so even now I’ve read the book, and I know all her secrets. (Or I think I do.)
Varjak defeated The Gentlemen at the end of Varjak Paw, and has now returned to life on the streets. However, he’s not out of danger as cats are still disappearing – or worse. In a way, it surprises me this is a children’s book, as a lot of it is terrifying. But I don’t think I was scared of anything much as a child. Now, I’ve realised the world is dangerous and there are people out there who want to hurt you. In some ways, I haven’t grown up at all, and some people would say I’m quite babyish in the things I’ve scared of. But I do think adults have a more developed sense of fear.
Jalal no longer needs to teach Varjak The Way – although his powers have conveniently and rather inexplicably deserted him. I never quite understand why Varjak lost his powers or how he got them back, but it did give the situation an extra sense of urgency. Jalal teaches Varjak other things instead – and, as in the earlier book, Jalal’s teachings help Varjak as he progresses through the story.
Said is great at creating strong characters and there are lots of new ones to enjoy here. The Scratch Sisters (for some reason I keep calling them The Snatch Sisters), a trio of kung-fu Siamese cats, are my favourites. Then there are a couple of Sally Bones’ minions who change side, Omar and Ossie, who seem rather more cuddly. I loved the way such different individuals – mostly cats, but with Cludge the dog, of course - were bonding together in order to fight Sally Bones.
But the veiled sex references didn’t seem quite appropriate. Maybe it’s because I’ve seen the opera, where Holly is presented as being around sixteen, with Varjak no more than ten. So when Said starts hinting that there might be Holljak kittens before too long, it’s a little bit disturbing. Maybe if I hadn’t seen the opera, I’d think it was sweet, but I have, so I don’t.
Monday 19 October 2009
Varjak Paw (S F Said)****
I wasn’t going to review this because it’s a children’s book.
But I’m not sure that’s any reason not to review it.
It’s still a book and I’m sure I’m not the only adult in the world who would find this book enjoyable. Not every adult will enjoy it, but not every adult will enjoy the other books I’ve reviewed. Even I didn’t enjoy a lot of them. Varjak Paw is written in quite a literary style but it’s easy to understand. I’m not sure what age group it’s aimed at but I never felt it was babyish in any way. Varjak and his friends are in many ways a lot more grown up than the adult characters I’ve written about on this blog.
Some people might choose not to read the book because it’s about cats rather than humans. But animals can make fascinating protagonists. And a cat with super powers makes a nice change from all the superhumans. I kind of kept imagining Varjak as a human in this book because the book Varjak Paw is very like Act One of the opera Varjak Paw, and they were dressed as humans. My friend Barry did a really nice review of the opera, so go and read that if you want to.
I first read this book a couple of years ago. I picked it up because I wanted something to read and I got into it really quickly. Then I went to see the Varjak Paw opera, and I loved it so much, I decided to read the book again – and also the sequel, which I didn’t know about before.
The characters are really lovely, especially Varjak. The basic plot isn’t anything new: there have been lots of stories about scared, physically weak characters who become heroes – but it’s a plotline I really like to read because I would quite like it if one day I became a hero. Everyone thought I was brave when I went on the Underground two days after the terrorist attacks (even though I never went on the Underground normally because I was scared it would make me sick), but mostly people think I’m quite pathetic. I think it all depends on how you view bravery – I do things that scare me all the time – but a character like Varjak is almost always going to be appealing.
I wasn’t sure about his friend Holly at first – she is described as spiky-looking, and the word ‘spiky’ suits her personality as well. But I warmed to her once I could see her relationship with her friend Tam. Tam isn’t very clever but she is very sweet – and it’s good to have such a loveable character who’s a bit fat and is happy to stay that way. I wish they were more human characters like that. A lot of outwardly abrasive people like Holly wouldn’t show such patience with people who are slower than them – Holly is very bright – but Holly is lovely to Tam and also their dog friend Cludge, who makes Tam look like a candidate for Mensa. Cludge is a great character too - fiercely loyal, like a lot of fictional dogs, but quite original I think.
Another thing I really like about the characters is that it’s not just a matter of Varjak the SuperCat and his three sidekicks. Varjak would really struggle without Cludge’s strength and Holly’s intelligence, and I like that because it makes Varjak less like a god, and makes his friends a really important part of the story.
It was also really interesting the way Varjak learns a little bit more about the Way as he goes through the book. The Seven Skills of the Way help cats with things like hunting and fighting, as well as helping them to know themselves and others. It would have been too much to take in all at one go – although Said does give us a tantalising glimpse at the beginning, when the Elder Paw, Varjak’s grandfather, tells Varjak the names of three of the seven skills. Slow Time, Moving Circles and Shadow Walking do sound very intriguing.
The book is fast-paced and full of action. When I heard there was going to be an opera, I knew that would work really well – the coming of age theme happens a lot in opera as well. There’s also a lot of humour – such as Varjak’s attempts to find a dog to talk to – and the character of Sally Bones is truly terrifying. Sally Bones is hardly in the book at all, but she makes a really strong impression. I could complain that her story has no real ending in Varjak Paw, but in a way her scene is a prequel to the next book, where she becomes a major character. There’s a really scary picture of her as well. Dave McKean has done some great illustrations all the way through. Occasionally they make the text difficult to read but I really like them. Adult books don’t have enough pictures. A good illustrator can add a lot to a story.
But I’m not sure that’s any reason not to review it.
It’s still a book and I’m sure I’m not the only adult in the world who would find this book enjoyable. Not every adult will enjoy it, but not every adult will enjoy the other books I’ve reviewed. Even I didn’t enjoy a lot of them. Varjak Paw is written in quite a literary style but it’s easy to understand. I’m not sure what age group it’s aimed at but I never felt it was babyish in any way. Varjak and his friends are in many ways a lot more grown up than the adult characters I’ve written about on this blog.
Some people might choose not to read the book because it’s about cats rather than humans. But animals can make fascinating protagonists. And a cat with super powers makes a nice change from all the superhumans. I kind of kept imagining Varjak as a human in this book because the book Varjak Paw is very like Act One of the opera Varjak Paw, and they were dressed as humans. My friend Barry did a really nice review of the opera, so go and read that if you want to.
I first read this book a couple of years ago. I picked it up because I wanted something to read and I got into it really quickly. Then I went to see the Varjak Paw opera, and I loved it so much, I decided to read the book again – and also the sequel, which I didn’t know about before.
The characters are really lovely, especially Varjak. The basic plot isn’t anything new: there have been lots of stories about scared, physically weak characters who become heroes – but it’s a plotline I really like to read because I would quite like it if one day I became a hero. Everyone thought I was brave when I went on the Underground two days after the terrorist attacks (even though I never went on the Underground normally because I was scared it would make me sick), but mostly people think I’m quite pathetic. I think it all depends on how you view bravery – I do things that scare me all the time – but a character like Varjak is almost always going to be appealing.
I wasn’t sure about his friend Holly at first – she is described as spiky-looking, and the word ‘spiky’ suits her personality as well. But I warmed to her once I could see her relationship with her friend Tam. Tam isn’t very clever but she is very sweet – and it’s good to have such a loveable character who’s a bit fat and is happy to stay that way. I wish they were more human characters like that. A lot of outwardly abrasive people like Holly wouldn’t show such patience with people who are slower than them – Holly is very bright – but Holly is lovely to Tam and also their dog friend Cludge, who makes Tam look like a candidate for Mensa. Cludge is a great character too - fiercely loyal, like a lot of fictional dogs, but quite original I think.
Another thing I really like about the characters is that it’s not just a matter of Varjak the SuperCat and his three sidekicks. Varjak would really struggle without Cludge’s strength and Holly’s intelligence, and I like that because it makes Varjak less like a god, and makes his friends a really important part of the story.
It was also really interesting the way Varjak learns a little bit more about the Way as he goes through the book. The Seven Skills of the Way help cats with things like hunting and fighting, as well as helping them to know themselves and others. It would have been too much to take in all at one go – although Said does give us a tantalising glimpse at the beginning, when the Elder Paw, Varjak’s grandfather, tells Varjak the names of three of the seven skills. Slow Time, Moving Circles and Shadow Walking do sound very intriguing.
The book is fast-paced and full of action. When I heard there was going to be an opera, I knew that would work really well – the coming of age theme happens a lot in opera as well. There’s also a lot of humour – such as Varjak’s attempts to find a dog to talk to – and the character of Sally Bones is truly terrifying. Sally Bones is hardly in the book at all, but she makes a really strong impression. I could complain that her story has no real ending in Varjak Paw, but in a way her scene is a prequel to the next book, where she becomes a major character. There’s a really scary picture of her as well. Dave McKean has done some great illustrations all the way through. Occasionally they make the text difficult to read but I really like them. Adult books don’t have enough pictures. A good illustrator can add a lot to a story.
Tuesday 13 October 2009
Holly's Inbox: Scandal in the City (Holly Denham)****
Holly’s Inbox (which can be viewed on the Internet) is a great idea that probably worked really well online, but Holly’s Inbox the book didn’t quite work. For Holly’s Inbox: Scandal in the City, most of the difficulties have been completely ironed out. Perhaps the reason why Holly’s Inbox didn’t quite work as a book was because it hadn’t been conceived as one. It was more of a soap opera online. In soap operas, it’s just one incident after another, and very few long-term storylines. But presumably when Holly Denham started work on her next lot of fictional e-mails, she knew another book was a strong possibility – and Holly’s Inbox: Scandal in the City does feel like a novel.
The fact that it’s more like a novel does in some ways make it seem less like a series of e-mails. A lot of the e-mails read a lot more like instant messages or spoken conversations. But the characters do have an amazing amount of time each day in which to send e-mails. I don’t have that amount of time and I don’t have a job. And all e-mails take place at work! If I ever get a job I’ll never spend all that time e-mailing. It’s not even as though their jobs are easy. Somehow, none of them seem to have e-mail at home and it’s also surprising that close friends would e-mail one another the juicy details at work rather than catching up at the weekend. And there’s also the problem that anything not described in an e-mail is not seen by the reader.
But you can’t have everything, and it’s difficult to see how Denham – or anyone – could have done it any better. Besides. I’d rather have dramatic e-mails like these that make a great novel than e-mails that sound like e-mails but don’t really work in a book. I bought Scandal in the City because I wanted to read a book, and a book is exactly what I got.
Maybe Denham could have varied things a bit as the scene where Trisha writes e-mails about Holly’s being absent from work due to a broken heart is almost exactly like the scene in Holly’s Inbox where Trisha writes e-mails about Holly’s being absent from work due to a broken heart. But at least this guy was vaguely worth it.
I didn’t like Holly in Holly’s Inbox, but I liked her a lot in this book. It annoyed me slightly (and okay yes I was jealous) that everyone clearly adored Holly but I was agreeing with them before too long. She is very funny and the insanity of her day-to-day life contrasts surprisingly well with her considerable abilities at work. Holly is amazing at her job. Funny, friendly – and a real professional. Despite the amount of time she spends e-mailing.
The other characters are brilliantly done too. Trisha didn’t feature a lot during the early part of the book, and I missed her dry sarcasm, but she was in it more later on. The adorably dippy Claire and the calm and apparently conservative Marie are a great addition to the team. The wonderfully filthy yet wonderfully innocent Aisha returns, along with flamboyant Jason, who is trying desperately to make his boyfriend dump him. Then there are asides from Holly’s mad family, and the one everyone thinks is mad, Holly’s delightfully intrepid Granny.
There are two great villains too. One just pops up occasionally and gives you a good laugh; the other is very cleverly written: a total bitch who is really nice to Holly in a way that doesn’t quite disguise her bitchiness.
There was a rather unrealistic bit at the end – which stood out mostly because I could imagine the rest of the book happening to real people. Even the mad bits. Not only is this moment unrealistic, it’s also not the sort of thing I’d have expected the company directors to put up with for a minute. But it was so much fun, I think Denham gets away with it.
The fact that it’s more like a novel does in some ways make it seem less like a series of e-mails. A lot of the e-mails read a lot more like instant messages or spoken conversations. But the characters do have an amazing amount of time each day in which to send e-mails. I don’t have that amount of time and I don’t have a job. And all e-mails take place at work! If I ever get a job I’ll never spend all that time e-mailing. It’s not even as though their jobs are easy. Somehow, none of them seem to have e-mail at home and it’s also surprising that close friends would e-mail one another the juicy details at work rather than catching up at the weekend. And there’s also the problem that anything not described in an e-mail is not seen by the reader.
But you can’t have everything, and it’s difficult to see how Denham – or anyone – could have done it any better. Besides. I’d rather have dramatic e-mails like these that make a great novel than e-mails that sound like e-mails but don’t really work in a book. I bought Scandal in the City because I wanted to read a book, and a book is exactly what I got.
Maybe Denham could have varied things a bit as the scene where Trisha writes e-mails about Holly’s being absent from work due to a broken heart is almost exactly like the scene in Holly’s Inbox where Trisha writes e-mails about Holly’s being absent from work due to a broken heart. But at least this guy was vaguely worth it.
I didn’t like Holly in Holly’s Inbox, but I liked her a lot in this book. It annoyed me slightly (and okay yes I was jealous) that everyone clearly adored Holly but I was agreeing with them before too long. She is very funny and the insanity of her day-to-day life contrasts surprisingly well with her considerable abilities at work. Holly is amazing at her job. Funny, friendly – and a real professional. Despite the amount of time she spends e-mailing.
The other characters are brilliantly done too. Trisha didn’t feature a lot during the early part of the book, and I missed her dry sarcasm, but she was in it more later on. The adorably dippy Claire and the calm and apparently conservative Marie are a great addition to the team. The wonderfully filthy yet wonderfully innocent Aisha returns, along with flamboyant Jason, who is trying desperately to make his boyfriend dump him. Then there are asides from Holly’s mad family, and the one everyone thinks is mad, Holly’s delightfully intrepid Granny.
There are two great villains too. One just pops up occasionally and gives you a good laugh; the other is very cleverly written: a total bitch who is really nice to Holly in a way that doesn’t quite disguise her bitchiness.
There was a rather unrealistic bit at the end – which stood out mostly because I could imagine the rest of the book happening to real people. Even the mad bits. Not only is this moment unrealistic, it’s also not the sort of thing I’d have expected the company directors to put up with for a minute. But it was so much fun, I think Denham gets away with it.
Sunday 11 October 2009
Second Chance (Jane Green)**
I only read this because my friend offered it to me cheap. She hadn’t been able to finish it, and there were several moments – maybe one on every page – where I wondered if I was going to give up on it too. But it did pick up a bit in the middle, and it is a lot better than the other Jane Green book I read, Straight Talking.
Second Chance begins when a group of old schoolfriends get together for the first time for years following the death of Tom, another member of their group. He died in a terrorist attack. This annoyed me a bit as a lot of people really did lose friends and family in this way and it somehow seems a bit too close to the events to start making money out of it by writing a book. I don’t mind stories set in the Second World War though, so maybe I’ll get used to terrorist stories.
They sit around the table and talk about their lives, all displaying an irritating characteristic of talking about themselves without the use of a first person subject pronoun. (“Am this. Did that. Married X.”) Just don’t hear this very often, so was surprised when this large-ish group of people who have had completely different lives all start doing it at once. Didn’t find it very realistic. Am not however accustomed to sitting round in large groups.
The characters are a lot stronger than this opening suggests. The main character, Holly, drives me mad – like most fictional Hollys, she is one of the most miserable creations in fiction. We’re all supposed to love her, but I just wanted her to shut up and go away somewhere where I didn’t have to read about her. Then there’s the allegedly sweet, gentle Olivia, who somehow has the filthiest mouth of all of them. Paul, the organiser, somehow fades into the background, but Anna and Saffron between them make the book worthwhile.
Anna is bossy Paul’s wife. She unable to get pregnant and not very happy, but manages to push this aside in order to help a group of people she hardly knows. Maybe part of the reason I find it difficult to admire Holly for this characteristic is because Anna had it in shitloads.
Saffron is an actress who has been touted as the Next Best Thing for years, but hasn’t yet made it. Saffron has done a number of stupid things in her time, and has a bad habit of saying the first thing that comes into her head, but there’s something very endearing about her: something very normal, even though her life isn’t the sort of thing most people can imagine.
But Green makes it very difficult for us to form our own opinions of her characters. All the way through, she keeps telling us what to think. She stops the narrative in order to give us some anecdote that apparently proves her point. But I don’t want her telling me all this. I prefer to be able to form my own opinions – and there are much more subtle ways for an author to make a character’s personality clear. Maybe I’m less likely to pick up on subtle things but I don’t want any author beating it into my head with a rolling pin either.
She tells us how horrible Marcus is to Holly right from the start – which left me wanting to defend the poor guy. He’s obviously a total prat but he's also very insecure. He isn’t a completely unsympathetic character although I did go off him later. I sympathised with him a lot more than Holly because Holly had the author bigging her up at every opportunity, whereas poor Marcus is constantly put down. No wonder he wants to show how good he is all the time. I wouldn’t want to marry him though!
There are good bits in this book. You could just read the Saffron bits and ignore the rest. It would be quite a good book then. But it would also be a very short book.
Second Chance begins when a group of old schoolfriends get together for the first time for years following the death of Tom, another member of their group. He died in a terrorist attack. This annoyed me a bit as a lot of people really did lose friends and family in this way and it somehow seems a bit too close to the events to start making money out of it by writing a book. I don’t mind stories set in the Second World War though, so maybe I’ll get used to terrorist stories.
They sit around the table and talk about their lives, all displaying an irritating characteristic of talking about themselves without the use of a first person subject pronoun. (“Am this. Did that. Married X.”) Just don’t hear this very often, so was surprised when this large-ish group of people who have had completely different lives all start doing it at once. Didn’t find it very realistic. Am not however accustomed to sitting round in large groups.
The characters are a lot stronger than this opening suggests. The main character, Holly, drives me mad – like most fictional Hollys, she is one of the most miserable creations in fiction. We’re all supposed to love her, but I just wanted her to shut up and go away somewhere where I didn’t have to read about her. Then there’s the allegedly sweet, gentle Olivia, who somehow has the filthiest mouth of all of them. Paul, the organiser, somehow fades into the background, but Anna and Saffron between them make the book worthwhile.
Anna is bossy Paul’s wife. She unable to get pregnant and not very happy, but manages to push this aside in order to help a group of people she hardly knows. Maybe part of the reason I find it difficult to admire Holly for this characteristic is because Anna had it in shitloads.
Saffron is an actress who has been touted as the Next Best Thing for years, but hasn’t yet made it. Saffron has done a number of stupid things in her time, and has a bad habit of saying the first thing that comes into her head, but there’s something very endearing about her: something very normal, even though her life isn’t the sort of thing most people can imagine.
But Green makes it very difficult for us to form our own opinions of her characters. All the way through, she keeps telling us what to think. She stops the narrative in order to give us some anecdote that apparently proves her point. But I don’t want her telling me all this. I prefer to be able to form my own opinions – and there are much more subtle ways for an author to make a character’s personality clear. Maybe I’m less likely to pick up on subtle things but I don’t want any author beating it into my head with a rolling pin either.
She tells us how horrible Marcus is to Holly right from the start – which left me wanting to defend the poor guy. He’s obviously a total prat but he's also very insecure. He isn’t a completely unsympathetic character although I did go off him later. I sympathised with him a lot more than Holly because Holly had the author bigging her up at every opportunity, whereas poor Marcus is constantly put down. No wonder he wants to show how good he is all the time. I wouldn’t want to marry him though!
There are good bits in this book. You could just read the Saffron bits and ignore the rest. It would be quite a good book then. But it would also be a very short book.
Monday 5 October 2009
The Wag's Diary (Alison Kervin)****
I know I’m supposed to admire Wags for being so well-dressed but I’m really not sure if they’re the ideal role models. Just because Victoria Beckham can cope with being Size 0 when she has three young boys, a ‘busy life’ as the wife of a footballer and a career as a fashion designer (and sometimes a ‘singer’) – not to mention the fact she seems to spend half her life shopping, which is exhausting – it doesn’t mean everyone in the world can cope with being Size 0, and it certainly doesn’t mean people ought to try.
Your health is a million times more important than how you look, and you certainly shouldn’t risk your health just because some footballer’s wife is skinny enough to fit down a drainpipe. I’m Size 0 because I have problems with my stomach, but if anyone decided to start copying me I’d be horrified. It really isn’t that good being thin. I’ve probably only got my stomach condition in the first place because I didn’t have the life skills to feed myself properly when I went to study away from home. Now I can’t eat enough to get myself up to a healthy weight, and I have dizzy spells all the time. People who try to get this thin on purpose are morons. And Louise Redknapp (who is kind of a Wag and isn’t Size 0) would agree with me.
As for the clothes thing, I’m just not interested, and if I do ever marry Gareth Southgate, which I won’t because he’s already married and there’s NO WAY I’m moving to Middlesbrough (it looks like a lovely place, but it doesn’t have the West End, and no I’m NOT talking about shops). But anyway even if Middlesbrough was relocated to London and I did somehow end up being a Wag (according to this book, football managers have Wags too), I WOULD NOT start wearing short skirts and little tops and high heels to football matches. I’d rather DIE. There’s only one kind of top you should wear to football matches (and no I am NOT giving you fashion advice) and that’s a shirt featuring the team you most want to win. High heels are stupid because there’s a million steps to go up and I fall over when I’m wearing them on flat ground and how are you supposed to jump up and down when your team scores if you’re wearing heels? Skirts are okay, but not without underwear. It’s too cold, and if I want to relax and sit with my legs open like my guy mates, I’d like to be able to do that without being indecent. And if you think it’s indecent for me to have my legs open under any circumstances – well, all your idols do it! That’s how we know they’re wearing no knickers.
Tracie Martin, the fictional Wag in this novel, is the Waggiest Wag in the universe. She spends most of her time thinking about hair extensions (I’ve never knowingly even seen a hair extension: if you want long hair, just grow it, that’s what I say) and what she’s going to wear to her husband Dean’s next match. So it should really be the most boring book in the universe for me. And some of the time, it is. But it’s also really funny because (I hope) Tracie is an exaggerated version of a Wag, and the way she worries about things I’ve never even heard of is hysterical. And her driving is worse than mine, which is always nice to see.
Tracie is completely ridiculous – but she is a very nice person, and that’s part of what makes the book really fun. We’re not just reading about some bitch we’re expected to admire for her dress sense. We’re reading about a not particularly intelligent but really lovely person who happens to care very much about clothes. I can put up with the clothes business and the hair business and the makeup business (although I’d rather die than go shopping with her) because it’s great to read about such a likeable character. A lot of the time, we’re laughing at her for being so stupid, but always in a very sympathetic way. Tracie always means well. And it’s not like I’ve never done something stupid. Maybe not in the last half-hour or so, but certainly in the last hour.
Alison Kervin clearly knows both football and Wags very well, which makes the book even better. Tracie’s daughter is named Paskia Rose, which is somehow the most perfectly Waggish name I can think of. I’ve never heard of anything called Paskia (maybe she was born at Easter?), but it’s not a real name, and that’s all that matters. Tracie wants Paskia to grow up to be a Wag like her, but unfortunately she takes after her father, Dean, and is a very gifted footballer. The only difference between Dean and Paskia is that Paskia always scores into the right net. (I do find it a bit hard to swallow that Dean once played for Arsenal, but I suppose even Ashley Cole played for Arsenal.)
The only thing I don’t like about this book is that Tracie becomes a hugely famous blogger. Apart from the fact I don’t like reading about writers, and I especially don’t want to have to read samples of their work (it does seem a bit like Kervin is congratulating herself on her own writing ability every time a character says how great Tracie’s writing is). But Tracie’s blogs are hysterically funny. And they really are great and it's not surprising everyone loves them. And yes, I am jealous!
There is a serious storyline in this book but it’s really a bit weak. It is interesting but it’s a lot less original than the rest of the book and I don’t think even mild child abuse really fits in with a comedy. Also, some parts of the story are left unresolved at the end as Tracie seems to have forgotten about them. But perhaps we’ll find out more in Kervin’s sequel – which I’m really looking forward to reading.
Your health is a million times more important than how you look, and you certainly shouldn’t risk your health just because some footballer’s wife is skinny enough to fit down a drainpipe. I’m Size 0 because I have problems with my stomach, but if anyone decided to start copying me I’d be horrified. It really isn’t that good being thin. I’ve probably only got my stomach condition in the first place because I didn’t have the life skills to feed myself properly when I went to study away from home. Now I can’t eat enough to get myself up to a healthy weight, and I have dizzy spells all the time. People who try to get this thin on purpose are morons. And Louise Redknapp (who is kind of a Wag and isn’t Size 0) would agree with me.
As for the clothes thing, I’m just not interested, and if I do ever marry Gareth Southgate, which I won’t because he’s already married and there’s NO WAY I’m moving to Middlesbrough (it looks like a lovely place, but it doesn’t have the West End, and no I’m NOT talking about shops). But anyway even if Middlesbrough was relocated to London and I did somehow end up being a Wag (according to this book, football managers have Wags too), I WOULD NOT start wearing short skirts and little tops and high heels to football matches. I’d rather DIE. There’s only one kind of top you should wear to football matches (and no I am NOT giving you fashion advice) and that’s a shirt featuring the team you most want to win. High heels are stupid because there’s a million steps to go up and I fall over when I’m wearing them on flat ground and how are you supposed to jump up and down when your team scores if you’re wearing heels? Skirts are okay, but not without underwear. It’s too cold, and if I want to relax and sit with my legs open like my guy mates, I’d like to be able to do that without being indecent. And if you think it’s indecent for me to have my legs open under any circumstances – well, all your idols do it! That’s how we know they’re wearing no knickers.
Tracie Martin, the fictional Wag in this novel, is the Waggiest Wag in the universe. She spends most of her time thinking about hair extensions (I’ve never knowingly even seen a hair extension: if you want long hair, just grow it, that’s what I say) and what she’s going to wear to her husband Dean’s next match. So it should really be the most boring book in the universe for me. And some of the time, it is. But it’s also really funny because (I hope) Tracie is an exaggerated version of a Wag, and the way she worries about things I’ve never even heard of is hysterical. And her driving is worse than mine, which is always nice to see.
Tracie is completely ridiculous – but she is a very nice person, and that’s part of what makes the book really fun. We’re not just reading about some bitch we’re expected to admire for her dress sense. We’re reading about a not particularly intelligent but really lovely person who happens to care very much about clothes. I can put up with the clothes business and the hair business and the makeup business (although I’d rather die than go shopping with her) because it’s great to read about such a likeable character. A lot of the time, we’re laughing at her for being so stupid, but always in a very sympathetic way. Tracie always means well. And it’s not like I’ve never done something stupid. Maybe not in the last half-hour or so, but certainly in the last hour.
Alison Kervin clearly knows both football and Wags very well, which makes the book even better. Tracie’s daughter is named Paskia Rose, which is somehow the most perfectly Waggish name I can think of. I’ve never heard of anything called Paskia (maybe she was born at Easter?), but it’s not a real name, and that’s all that matters. Tracie wants Paskia to grow up to be a Wag like her, but unfortunately she takes after her father, Dean, and is a very gifted footballer. The only difference between Dean and Paskia is that Paskia always scores into the right net. (I do find it a bit hard to swallow that Dean once played for Arsenal, but I suppose even Ashley Cole played for Arsenal.)
The only thing I don’t like about this book is that Tracie becomes a hugely famous blogger. Apart from the fact I don’t like reading about writers, and I especially don’t want to have to read samples of their work (it does seem a bit like Kervin is congratulating herself on her own writing ability every time a character says how great Tracie’s writing is). But Tracie’s blogs are hysterically funny. And they really are great and it's not surprising everyone loves them. And yes, I am jealous!
There is a serious storyline in this book but it’s really a bit weak. It is interesting but it’s a lot less original than the rest of the book and I don’t think even mild child abuse really fits in with a comedy. Also, some parts of the story are left unresolved at the end as Tracie seems to have forgotten about them. But perhaps we’ll find out more in Kervin’s sequel – which I’m really looking forward to reading.
Friday 2 October 2009
My Best Friend's Girl (Dorothy Koomson)***
I nearly didn’t read this. Dorothy Koomson’s The Chocolate Run was such a disappointment, I probably wouldn’t have read this if it hadn’t been from the library. But luckily it was from the library, so I did read it.
At first, I was a bit worried that I wasn’t going to like it. All this soppy clichéd deathbed forgiveness stuff is bad for my emetophobia, and cute precocious little kids aren’t that much better. Kamryn, the main character, really did seem to be a bit of a bitch, although at least I preferred her to her friend Adele, who slept with Kamryn’s fiancé. The fact that Adele was dying of cancer when the book began didn’t really make her actions any more forgiveable. She doesn’t deserve to die – but Kamryn does not deserve to be betrayed by her fiancé and her best friend like that, no matter how much of a bitch she is.
But that, in a way, is what this book’s all about – and quite possibly what parts of The Chocolate Run were about as well. Most people aren’t perfect.
Kamryn isn’t always a particularly nice person to read about. This put me off at first, but I ended up liking her in the end. She can be very nasty, but so can everyone. She can also be very nice. She just makes a very bad first impression on the people she meets in real life, and so in a way it’s only natural that readers should experience some of the same misgivings.
The danger with writing about a character like this is that some people will give up on the book because they don’t want to read about such horrible people. I was very tempted to give up. It’s possible I would have done if I didn’t have a book blog to slag it off in. But I did kind of want to know what was going to happen. Or not so much what was going to happen – the book was quite predictable - it was more that I wanted to know how it was going to happen.
Sometimes, when you’re reading a book, you can tell what’s going to happen – but you can’t think how the author is going to reach this conclusion in a convincing way. Or also, as in the case of Marian Keyes’ Angels, you can see that something is causing a character to behave very badly, and you want to know the reason for this. The explanation, when it comes, might be a very good explanation in theory, but (especially when we don’t find out until near the end of the book) it’s not always quite enough to make me like the character. So Koomson really had a very difficult job on her hands: she had to evoke the change in Kamryn convincingly, and in such a way that her readers ended up liking her despite everything.
Koomson did this really well. She moved from one situation to another very neatly. In some ways, it would have been nice if the story hadn’t suddenly jumped forward a year just before the end of the book, as quite a lot happened, and I’d have liked to read about it. (So by then, I must have liked Kamryn a lot – if I don’t like a character, the last thing I want is to read more about her than I have to!) But the parts of Kamryn’s story Koomson did tell showed her to be a fascinating character.
My Best Friend’s Girl is also a very moving book, but anyone who can write reasonably well and treat this sort of subject matter with sensitivity would have struggled not to make the book moving. The things that make the book impressive is that Koomson has created a horrible yet compelling and eventually likeable main character – and that some of the book is really funny.
She also creates a gorgeous hero. There are two men in the book. One is really gorgeous and sweet; the other one is a bit of a wanker (in my opinion), but does have a really good rapport with Kamryn. For most of the book, I was horribly afraid Kamryn was going to end up with the horrible one. (Yes, I cared about her enough to worry about that.) Luckily, she ended up with the one I liked. But it wouldn’t surprise me if some people preferred the other one.
At first, I was a bit worried that I wasn’t going to like it. All this soppy clichéd deathbed forgiveness stuff is bad for my emetophobia, and cute precocious little kids aren’t that much better. Kamryn, the main character, really did seem to be a bit of a bitch, although at least I preferred her to her friend Adele, who slept with Kamryn’s fiancé. The fact that Adele was dying of cancer when the book began didn’t really make her actions any more forgiveable. She doesn’t deserve to die – but Kamryn does not deserve to be betrayed by her fiancé and her best friend like that, no matter how much of a bitch she is.
But that, in a way, is what this book’s all about – and quite possibly what parts of The Chocolate Run were about as well. Most people aren’t perfect.
Kamryn isn’t always a particularly nice person to read about. This put me off at first, but I ended up liking her in the end. She can be very nasty, but so can everyone. She can also be very nice. She just makes a very bad first impression on the people she meets in real life, and so in a way it’s only natural that readers should experience some of the same misgivings.
The danger with writing about a character like this is that some people will give up on the book because they don’t want to read about such horrible people. I was very tempted to give up. It’s possible I would have done if I didn’t have a book blog to slag it off in. But I did kind of want to know what was going to happen. Or not so much what was going to happen – the book was quite predictable - it was more that I wanted to know how it was going to happen.
Sometimes, when you’re reading a book, you can tell what’s going to happen – but you can’t think how the author is going to reach this conclusion in a convincing way. Or also, as in the case of Marian Keyes’ Angels, you can see that something is causing a character to behave very badly, and you want to know the reason for this. The explanation, when it comes, might be a very good explanation in theory, but (especially when we don’t find out until near the end of the book) it’s not always quite enough to make me like the character. So Koomson really had a very difficult job on her hands: she had to evoke the change in Kamryn convincingly, and in such a way that her readers ended up liking her despite everything.
Koomson did this really well. She moved from one situation to another very neatly. In some ways, it would have been nice if the story hadn’t suddenly jumped forward a year just before the end of the book, as quite a lot happened, and I’d have liked to read about it. (So by then, I must have liked Kamryn a lot – if I don’t like a character, the last thing I want is to read more about her than I have to!) But the parts of Kamryn’s story Koomson did tell showed her to be a fascinating character.
My Best Friend’s Girl is also a very moving book, but anyone who can write reasonably well and treat this sort of subject matter with sensitivity would have struggled not to make the book moving. The things that make the book impressive is that Koomson has created a horrible yet compelling and eventually likeable main character – and that some of the book is really funny.
She also creates a gorgeous hero. There are two men in the book. One is really gorgeous and sweet; the other one is a bit of a wanker (in my opinion), but does have a really good rapport with Kamryn. For most of the book, I was horribly afraid Kamryn was going to end up with the horrible one. (Yes, I cared about her enough to worry about that.) Luckily, she ended up with the one I liked. But it wouldn’t surprise me if some people preferred the other one.
Thursday 1 October 2009
Shopaholic & Sister (Sophie Kinsella)***
I love Sophie Kinsella, so maybe this book is only disappointing because I know she can be brilliant. My expectations are really high where Kinsella is concerned, and it’s possible this book would have got four stars if it had been written by someone who’s a bit hit and miss for me like Cecelia Ahern (she’s on 2 hits and 2 misses so far). Or if someone to whom I reluctantly gave a second chance wrote it, like Jane Green anything even halfway good is a nice surprise because my expectations aren’t that high. But anything less than perfect from Kinsella is going to be a disappointment.
No, that probably isn’t fair! But who said I had to be objective?
The fourth Shopaholic book has lots of humour. Becky is really sweet and lovely, and Luke is a sex god, and some of their exchanges are just delightful. But I kind of got the feeling all the good bits had been done before. It was still fun when Becky realised she’d bought far more stuff on honeymoon than she’d realised, and no surprise that she would rather look a bit deranged than miss out on the chance of the hottest handbag on the market – okay, it is a handbag with an angel on it, but even so, making deals with random strangers thus ensuring that other shoppers unfairly miss out on the bag does seem to be going a bit far. It was still quite funny though.
But surely there was no need for Becky to get Luke’s business in trouble yet again. Becky is so much funnier when the situations she gets into aren’t so horribly serious.
The idea of Becky’s sister Jess who hates shopping was wonderful in theory, but didn’t quite work for me in practice because I didn’t like Jess. There’s nothing wrong with not liking shopping. I hate it. I don’t mind going into bookshops and buying books, and if Waterstones or Blackwall’s or something like that started selling clothes as well, maybe I wouldn’t mind buying clothes in there. But Becky is a lovely person. The idea of going shopping with Becky does make me want to scream, although maybe we could turn it into a fair exchange whereby I go shopping with her, and she gives me Luke. I could certainly bring myself to go along with that.
Jess seemed to be set up as the complete opposite of Becky, and that was quite funny at first. But she didn’t seem to be nearly so rounded a character as most of those in Kinsella’s books. Also, she’s really rude. It’s not an accidental rudeness, which would have been fine. You never get the impression Jess is being rude because she’s stressed or scared or because she simply has no idea what she’s saying. She just seems to say whatever would discomfit Becky the most – which would be fine if Kinsella wrote light, frothy, on-the-surface slapsticky books with shallow characterisation. But she doesn’t.
The ending was also very predictable. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of predictability at times: we do always know that things will turn out okay for Becky. But the ending to Shopaholic & Sister was the most clichéd ending imaginable, and I know Kinsella is capable of better.
No, that probably isn’t fair! But who said I had to be objective?
The fourth Shopaholic book has lots of humour. Becky is really sweet and lovely, and Luke is a sex god, and some of their exchanges are just delightful. But I kind of got the feeling all the good bits had been done before. It was still fun when Becky realised she’d bought far more stuff on honeymoon than she’d realised, and no surprise that she would rather look a bit deranged than miss out on the chance of the hottest handbag on the market – okay, it is a handbag with an angel on it, but even so, making deals with random strangers thus ensuring that other shoppers unfairly miss out on the bag does seem to be going a bit far. It was still quite funny though.
But surely there was no need for Becky to get Luke’s business in trouble yet again. Becky is so much funnier when the situations she gets into aren’t so horribly serious.
The idea of Becky’s sister Jess who hates shopping was wonderful in theory, but didn’t quite work for me in practice because I didn’t like Jess. There’s nothing wrong with not liking shopping. I hate it. I don’t mind going into bookshops and buying books, and if Waterstones or Blackwall’s or something like that started selling clothes as well, maybe I wouldn’t mind buying clothes in there. But Becky is a lovely person. The idea of going shopping with Becky does make me want to scream, although maybe we could turn it into a fair exchange whereby I go shopping with her, and she gives me Luke. I could certainly bring myself to go along with that.
Jess seemed to be set up as the complete opposite of Becky, and that was quite funny at first. But she didn’t seem to be nearly so rounded a character as most of those in Kinsella’s books. Also, she’s really rude. It’s not an accidental rudeness, which would have been fine. You never get the impression Jess is being rude because she’s stressed or scared or because she simply has no idea what she’s saying. She just seems to say whatever would discomfit Becky the most – which would be fine if Kinsella wrote light, frothy, on-the-surface slapsticky books with shallow characterisation. But she doesn’t.
The ending was also very predictable. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of predictability at times: we do always know that things will turn out okay for Becky. But the ending to Shopaholic & Sister was the most clichéd ending imaginable, and I know Kinsella is capable of better.
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